Good Help

A five-part exploration of wandering, wounding, healing, and becoming whole.

For most of my adult life, I carried a sense that something was wrong inside me—a persistent ache that I couldn’t name. I went searching for help at age 30, but for nearly thirty years I wandered through a mixture of misguided therapy, spiritualized shaming, poor counsel, and outright harm.

Only in 2016 did I finally encounter something different: good help—the kind of therapeutic presence that sees the whole of you, understands how you became who you are, and heals the wounds at the level where they formed.

This five-part series tells that story.

It moves from wandering…
to bad help…
to good help…
to healing…
and finally into vision.

Each part stands alone, but together they form a journey toward belovedness, coherence, and a more grounded way of living.

The Five Parts

Use the links below to read each reflection in order.

Part I — Wandering

The Long Road of Not Knowing What’s Wrong
A persistent inner ache, early attempts to get help, and decades of wandering through spiritual, psychological, and emotional confusion.

➡️ Read Part I
/journey-into-good-help-part-1-wandering

Part II — Bad Help

When Help Isn’t Help at All
Therapists who sold programs. Bad advice that rearranged your life without touching the wound. Spiritual tricks that hollowed you out instead of healing you. And the moment a therapist said, “Go f*** yourself,” ending the relationship and revealing what help is not.

➡️ Read Part II
/journey-into-good-help-part-2-bad-help

Part III — Good Help

The Help That Sees You, Holds You, and Heals You
The first real experience of help: safety, attunement, understanding, and healing at the level where the injury began. What “good help” actually looks like in practice.

➡️ Read Part III
/journey-into-good-help-part-3-good-help

Part IV — Healing

When Understanding, Love, and Safety Transform the Past
Healing as the slow, relational, sacred process that unfolds when shame meets compassion, triggers meet safety, and the young wounded parts of the self are finally welcomed home.

➡️ Read Part IV
/journey-into-good-help-part-4-healing

Part V — Vision

Building the Life That Can Only Be Built From Healing
Once the wounds are tended and the story understood, something new emerges: clarity, grounding, calling, connection, and a way of living aligned with belovedness.

➡️ Read Part V
/journey-into-good-help-part-5-vision

Why This Matters

Many people give up on therapy or spiritual counsel because their early experiences were unhelpful—or even harmful. This is my attempt to say:

  • Your confusion makes sense.
  • Your mistrust makes sense.
  • Your desire for real help is holy.

Good help exists.
It is rare.
It is worth finding.
And when you find it, it can change everything.

If This Resonates

You may also appreciate additional insights and future SeePhas commentary on:

Additional Topics:

Future Topics:
  • Attachment
  • Identity and Belovedness
  • Learning to Love Together
  • Theological Anthropology
  • Healing and Faith
  • The Wounded Inner Child
  • Practical Reflection Tools

(These will be linked as they’re released.)